By all accounts, this past week had all the makings of a tragedy (or at least a near-tragedy). A week ago Friday, my Dad went to the hospital for a heart catheterization. Less than an hour later, he was rushed across town for open-heart surgery. After seven days reminiscent of the Sandra Bullock film “While You Were Sleeping”, he finally opened his eyes and was back with us.

This was his third warning. Many people don’t get one, never mind three.

Bottom line: he scared the heck out of us. ..again.

To cope with the stress of the situation, my stepmother, my sister and I have been keeping track of the goings-on while he’s been sampling the pretty colors of another planet.

Day 1: My stepmother changed the cat litter before heading up to the hospital. Late that afternoon she arrived home, only to be greeted by a steaming pile of cat-stuff on the rug . “Oh no, not again!” was her cry, as she flashed back  to the cat’s Summer ailment which caused similar pile-ups. Her worry quickly disappeared as she discovered the reason: she’d accidentally turned the litterbox so that the dome’s opening was facing the wall, making entry impossible.

Day 3: My sister, fresh off a plane from Dallas, wanted to see our Dad. I let her borrow my car…and it was snowing. Less than fifteen minutes later came the call: “I just crashed your car!” As I arrived on the scene, she was already in the ambulance, being checked out (she’s okay, just sore). They asked which hospital she would like to be brought to. Her reply: “Well, I was already headed to this one, please take me there”. She got her wish, and a ride in a shiny red ambulance.

Day 5: My stepbrother David unvelied the funniest (or most cruel, depending upon whom you ask) idea for my Dad’s Christmas gift: a 2012 calendar, to make him think he’ been napping for two years. He even wanted to tell him that the Red Sox had re-signed Manny Ramirez.  ka-POW!!

We’ve kept track of these incidents, and many more, throughout the week.

The laughs have helped us to hang on through the stress, and bond as a family. It has been a way to blow off steam, and to celebrate my Dad’s life while we waited for him to return.

As soon as he woke up, we began sharing slivers of information. The first nurse he communicated with was Cynthia, a wonderfully sweet woman. He waved her over, pinched her cheek and hoarsely mouthed the words ‘thank you’.

I will admit, tragedy was winning for part of the week. Concerned doctors reporting a lack of progress nearly derailed our hopes several times.  

But the comedy that came from it will be stamped in our memories, forever.


Taking advantage of some free time today, I spent my lunch hour in front of the TV watching one of the many “Caught on Video” shows. It struck me as funny just how stupid some of our home-grown criminals can be. Do other countries deal with as many idiots as we seem to have?

Within 20 action-packed minutes, I observed:

1)  Five teens stealing a car, only to crash it into a house (and get caught)

2) A highly intoxicated man kicking the officer who pulled him over

3) A 16-year-old male holding up a store with a 22-caliber rifle, only to realize he forgot to put bullets in the gun. Reaching into his pockets, he realized he brought the wrong ones. Several store patrons managed to wrestle him to the ground.

In each of these situations, for every one criminal, there were many innocent bystanders (on the road and in the store) who were doing the right thing (which is ‘not’ doing the wrong thing).

After watching one person get Tasered for the second time, it struck me: it is so much easier to just do the right things in life! There are more people, in each situation, not doing bad things!

I’ve never seen anyone get chased or Tasered for helping out a neighbor, for holding a door, or for donating his/her time to charity.

I personally don’t think you have to work as  hard to be a good person.  It’s got to be easier than doing something illegal or damaging, and always having to look over your shoulder.

You just need to keep in mind that each day you have an opportunity to do one good thing, to make one person smile, or to add just a little bit of positive energy to the world.

I know this message will not reach everyone in the same way, and that is fine.  At least I know there will always be people out there making appearances on my TV, too dumb to get the message, and too dumb to not get caught on video.

Bad boys, bad boys…..  : )


 “Family means too much, Friends are too valuable, And life is too short, to put-off sharing with people, how much they really mean to you.” (unknown) 

My Dad has always told me: “If you’ve got something to say to someone, say it”. He’s a straight shooter, and people in his life have a pretty good idea how he feels about them.  Most enjoy it. Some are at the wrong end of his emotional rainbow (they likely earned it).

My family is about as close as a family can be. We’ve got our issues and occasional drama, like anyone else, but we are tight.

As for my Dad and I…

Everyone has a father. Many people are lucky enough to have a ‘Dad’. I am one of the luckiest of souls who has a best friend in his Dad. He and I have been calling each other ‘Bud’ since I was about fourteen (I am now just north of forty).

He knows how I feel, and I know how he feels, and that is a good thing.

What was designed as a routine heart catheterization yesterday morning quickly became an emergency double-bypass, as he was rushed from one hospital to the one across town. Some scary moments in the last 24 hours…

He’ll spend the next day or two in a fog of medications as he tries to comprehend what the heck happened to him.

Sitting in the ICU waiting room, I saw other families awaiting news on their loved ones. Some made it, some did not. It was sad to hear, from one woman, that her sister was driving from Maryland to see their relative, but she did not make it in time. I hope she does not have regrets. I hope she has been open and honest all her life, and that the family member knew how she felt.

Me? I have no regrets.  My Dad, as well as my family and friends, all know how I feel.

Do your family and friends know how special they are to you?

If not, would you be willing to pick up the phone this weekend to share a word or two? It doesn’t have to be a performance worthy of an Oscar for ‘Best Dramatic Moment in a Family Situation’. Perhaps you could send a ‘Because You’re Special’ card or e-mail, leave a voice-mail, or meet for lunch.

The holidays are upon us, a perfect time to share your love and kindness with others.

Life is too short to live with regrets, and we don’t always get a second chance to say things.

There is not always a tomorrow.

But there is a TODAY.

If you have stuck with me for this entire message, there is something very good about you. 

You are special.

I just want you to know that.


How often do we stare at the TV during a news broadcast on something going ‘wrong’ in the world, only to call out to a family member: “Someone should do something about that!”

Have you ever driven past an object in the road, only to exclaim: “Someone should move that before it causes an accident”.

How many times have we seen someone in need of help, only to think: “Someone should help that person!”

The next time you say or think one of these things, or similar, please consider doing this: find a mirror and repeat it out loud, while pointing at your reflection.

While you may not be able to travel halfway around the world to help in times of disaster, would you be willing to help someone locally who has been the victim of a storm, fire or criminal act?

Could you safely pull over and remove an object from the road, before it poses a threat to someone else?

Are you willing to help someone who is in need of a warm meal?

How many opportunities are there in our own home towns to add ourselves to the ‘helping’ equation?

Some will only require a moment of your time (moving a branch or trash can out of the road). Some are as simple as volunteering one night per week to feed the hungry at a local shelter (which also serves as an OUTSTANDING way to teach your children the value of giving).

Perhaps there is a family of a local serviceman or -woman who could use some assistance with yardwork, baby-sitting, snow-shoveling, etc. Not sure where to look? Visit your town hall, or a local church, and ask for the names of a local military family.

For every point of a finger, saying “Someone should do something”, there is an opportunity for YOU to be that person.

Think of the mirror. Think of the opportunity. Think of the example you are setting. Think if the impact on those you are helping.

In their hearts, a message is being played:

“I am so thankful SOMEONE did something to help”


Happy (almost) New Year, you made it!

Wait, what is that piece of paper under the lamp?  Let’s take a closer look.

 Uh-oh, it’s your list of resolutions from last year. Yup, there’s the date right there at the top, next to the doodles and salsa stain. Let’s see: lose weight, get in shape, spend quality time with the family, eat more home-cooked meals, paint the house, get the driveway resealed, keep the car clean. Wow, you had one heck of a year, huh? On paper.

 Long list. No checkmarks. Stuck in the starting gate…again.

 Before you subject it to a long, arcing toss into the trash, think again. There is nothing wrong with the list. There is nothing wrong with you. Still want to accomplish these goals? You can have them. You just need a better strategy. You need to get S.M.A.R.T.

 Specific: what do you want to do exactly

Measurable: can you keep track of your progress?

Attainable: can it be done?

Realistic: are you willing to work hard enough? 

Timely: what is your target date of completion?

 Let’s discuss weight. How many pounds would you like to lose in the coming year?  (my number is close to 30)

Is that number feasible, in a healthy way? Are you willing to work hard enough to make it happen? How long do you want it to take?

 As with any meaningful undertaking, you may wish to seek the help of professionals whether you are losing weight, keeping the car clean, resealing the driveway or painting your home. Why go it alone? There are companies out there who are passionate about helping you (nutritionists, trainers, car washes, sealers, painters). If you let them do their part, you will have more time for that other dream: more quality time with your family.

 You have 24 hours in each of the 365 days this year. We all do.

Brainstorm steps you can take day by day, week by week, month by month, to drive your dreams to completion.

Commit to them.

Follow through!

You might just AMAZE yourself, and inspire someone else who can’t quite find the strength to make it happen for themselves.


“One act of thanksgiving made when things go wrong is worth a thousand when things go well” (author unknown)

I’ll admit, this hasn’t exactly been a prosperous year for many people. I will not even pretend that is has been. I’ve heard enough ‘doom & gloom’ from the media to last a lifetime.

What I have also heard is a heart-warming collection of stories from people who have been dealt a difficult hand, and are still giving thanks for the air in their lungs, and for those around them who add value to their lives with a smile, a kind word or a helping hand.

These are the people in whom I place my faith for the recovery of our amazing, resilient nation…those who may not have all they once had, but are still thankful for the gifts they still have: family, friends, love, etc.

What are you thankful for this holiday season?

If you can take a moment to list them in a comment, I would love to hear them.

Who knows? You may trigger feelings of thanks in people who think that area of their lives is currently a blank slate.

If you can read these words, be thankful you have a computer, and the vision to read the screen.  That computer can be used to connect you to a world of people who are also thankful, if you choose to seek them out.

May you all be blessed with the company (or the happy memories) of loving family and friends this holiday season, and may this Thanksgiving create a long list of ‘thankful’ feelings which will carry on and grow through the rest of your days.

I am thankful for you!!!    

 

 


Early this morning, as I began climbing Mt. Facebook after 2 days away, I saw a handful of posts which made me sad. Kevin Knox, a legendary Boston comic, lost his half-decade battle with cancer during the night.

Kevin was a guy whom I’d seen many times over the last 17 years. While we never hung out together, I was on several shows which he hosted at the Comedy Connection. My favorite memory of those nights: no matter how neatly I hand-printed my name, he ALWAYS got it wrong when he brought me on-stage (and he always apologized, with a crazy laugh).

Despite today’s sad news, I am happy, and thankful, for the gift of his presence. 

It is hard to think of Kevin and not crack into a smile. The guy was electric.

He could create laughter from nothing, with just his energy and manic personality. 

We all have the opprtunity to create laughter for others. You don’t have to headline in Vegas, you don’t have to have your own TV show…you just need the right attitude, and the understanding that life offers us many, many things to laugh at.

Every time Kevin returned to better health after his treatments, he came back on fire. He stared life in the face and gave it hell every time he took the stage. He shared his support for up-and-coming comics,  and he earned his spot among Boston Comedy legends.

I shared a phone conversation with another great Boston comic and friend this afternoon. We talked about how lucky we are to do what we do for a living, and how some people are just miserable, every day. They hate their lives, but won’t do anything about it. And many of them just love to bring everyone else down around them. They dream of some bright future way off in the distance, but won’t make an effort to enjoy the journey, not realizing that their choice of road may never get them there.

Where is your life going?  Are you enjoying the journey?  Hey, not every day above ground is a great day, but can you find a little something to smile about, even for a minute? Can you make someone else laugh, to give them a shot at a better day? They might desperately need it.

If you can, then you’ve found the way to create magic moments. Create as many as you can, and light the path for yourselves and those around you.

Rest in peace, Kevin.

Thank you for showing us all how to laugh, and how to do it even in the face of serious challenges.

Thanks for the many great comedy memories (when you’re s***faced, the road is GIGANTIC!!).

Thank you for the lessons you taught us all, about comedy and about life.

The world was a much funnier place for you being here.


Every day, no matter where you are, you have an opportunity to bring value to the world.  With so much negative energy being showcased in the media, it can be tough to crowbar some positive energy into the mix.

But, it is there…and you can be on the front line, making it happen.

During a recent trip to Panera Bread in Manchester NH, I saw my friend Brianne (a wonderful staff member) escorting an older gentleman to his car. She introduced him as her friend Eddie. He is 96 years old. Every day he drives himself to Panera to get a coffee and read his newspaper. And every day, Brianne walks him to his car when he is ready to leave.

If I had to venture a guess, I’d be willing to bet that the Panera Handbook does not include this in the tasks for which an employee is paid. Brianne does it because that is the type of employee she is. She adds value to someone’s life, every time I see her.

No matter where we live and work, we all have the opportunity to create such value, to off-set a negative (somewhere in the world) with a positive contribution of our own.

What can you do?

It is late Fall here in New England.

Is there an elderly resident in your neighborhood for whom you could rake leaves?

Is there a military family in your town with one or both parents fighting to protect our freedom overseas?

Would you be willing to help out someone less fortunate this year so that their children could still believe in the magic of the holidays? 

Perhaps you could offer to help out in some way.

The list is endless, and so simple.

All it takes is a little heart, and the decision to make a difference…today.


“If you can’t feed a hundred people, then feed just one.” (Mother Teresa)

How many of us have grand ideas of how we would like to help the world..in a BIG way…someday?  It is very honorable to wish for this. If only we could help, to that extent, today.

I have wonderful news…we CAN!!!

As Mother Teresa said, if you cannot feed 100 people, just feed one. Imagine helping just one person to enjoy a healthy meal…today. Then imagine if 99 other people did the same.  BOOM!  100 people, healthfully fed!

We are all individual spokes in a wheel. We do not have to each be an entire wheel. When all the spokes move together, the world moves forward in a positive direction.

In the same vein, if you cannot hug 100 people today to bring some comfort…hug just one person. You can, and will, make a difference.

Is there someone in your world who could use a bit of cheering and encouragement today? You can provide that. You don’t have to cheer on every member of the team…just choose one person, and trust that somewhere, someone else will be cheering on another.

See how easy it can be? We are all part of this experience called life. And we can all help out one other person who is just like us. Some days we need that hug, or word of encouragement, or meal.

And isn’t it a wonderful feeling when someone takes the time and effort to help us?

Are you willing to hug someone today? To offer a cheerful greeting and support? To offer some healthy food to someone who desperately needs it?

The opportunities are not just halfway around the world, on a desolate continent. They are right there in your home town.

Seize the day, and make a difference.

You can do it. I know you can. You know you can.

We all can.


“We must become the change we want to see.” (Mahatma Gandhi)

As you roll out of bed at the dawn of a new week, go over your checklist.

Brush teeth?  Check!

Drink orange juice?  Check!  (ugh, should have done this FIRST!)

Start complaining because today is Monday?   Check?

Hmmmmm…how many of us will begin this new week by grumbling about everything that is wrong in the world, at home, at work?  How many of our problems grew even bigger over the weekend, and are waiting to dig their claws into us as we cross the threshold into a new day?

I’ve got a friend who reminds me every Sunday:  ”Tomorrow is Monday…and Mondays suck“.  This person has a long list of things wrong with the world, and the workplace.

What he doesn’t understand is this: complaining about the problem and not taking action to resolve it only adds more negative energy.  He is feeding the monster, not defeating it! 

At times, I’ll bet we are all been guilty of this. We are human. It’s okay.

However, today is a new day, and we can head out the door with a new approach, if we really want to.

Got a complaint on your mind?  If not, just look at your local paper. Pick one situation with which you are unhappy, and decide to take even one little action toward improving it. 

Did someone vandalize a local business?  Offer to help the owner repair the damage.

Got a problem with a co-worker? Perhaps a discussion with your boss, or HR, could clear the air and create a better office environment.

Dissatisfied with local political leaders? Sit in on a town meeting and voice your opinion, calmly and rationally.

As Gandhi said in the above quote, it is up to us to create the change we wish to see.

You have the opportunity to initiate that change. Somewhere out there, someone is secretly wishing that you will strike that first spark.

Are you willing to take that step, and become the change you want to see?