Spending Saturday Morning with the Cool Kids!

“You will probably never be on the front page of the newspaper.”

These were among the first words I shared with a group of 40+ teenagers and their advisers last Saturday morning as the first minutes of the day-long CLeW Community Leadership Workshop) event ticked away.

Why were they even there?

Someone in their lives saw something pretty cool in them. These are high school freshmen, and this event is a one-day introduction to leadership and community involvement, created by the HOBY (Hugh O’Brian Youth Leadership) program.

So why won’t they be gracing the front page anytime soon?

I was in the media for 10 years, and I know who winds up on the front page…bad people.

These young people are rock stars.

They intentionally invested their Saturday to join together in the name of community leadership and ‘giving back’.

This is my 4^th year as a volunteer speaker for the HOBY program.

Each time I am part of an event, my mind gets blown.

I am truly inspired by how much they care.

For all the trash people talk about how ‘this’ generation is lazy, misguided, unmotivated and unappreciative (doesn’t EVERY generation say that about the next one?), I know better.

Is there any evidence of these negative traits out there? Sure there are, but you could say that about any age group.

I recently celebrated my 47^th birthday. Do I know some 47-year-olds who are lazy, misguided, unmotivated and unappreciative?

Hell yes, I do.

It all comes down to what beliefs we hold strongest in our hearts and souls, the role models we choose, and the actions we take in response to the path we wish to travel…and these teens have chosen a positive, powerful one.

During my presentation (“Attitude, Action, Traction”) I shared the photo of a 9-year-old girl from the area who made a decision that she wanted to help the homeless. She gathered and distributed personal care items to the homeless with help from her family.

Unknown to me, one of the organizers of Saturday’s event (my very awesome friend Courtney) had already LOADED a conference room table with hundreds of personal care items which they would be assembling that day!

What is the key to MY success in life?

I continue to intentionally surround myself with cool, positive people who intentionally make a difference in this world.

THANK YOU to the HOBY-NH program and to all those who attended last Saturday’s CLeW event! I was honored to be asked to be there with you.

I don’t care what anyone else says…YOU ARE THE COOL KIDS!

We may never make the front page of the paper, but we are making a difference.

And that is all we need to do.

To all who are readingthis article: I don’t care how many candles are on your cake, YOU can be one of the Cool Kids, if you wish to be.

How can YOU make a difference this week?

Are You An Absolutely Incredible Kid… at Heart?

One of my favorite things about being an intentionally positive person, by choice, is the desire to celebrate as many things as I can. That doesn’t mean you’ll find me wearing plastic hats and discount Mardi Gras beads, shooting confetti from a leaf blower…but it does mean that I’ve got my eyes open for opportunities to share some praise and celebrate cool things.

Wednesday, March 19^th, is “Absolutely Incredible Kid Day”.

Do you know any?

I do.

Although not my typical target audience, several times a year I get to share my “Attitude, Action, Traction” presentation with several organizations which celebrate teens who intentionally making good things happen in their communities.

Several years ago, at a presentation for the Hugh O’Brian Youth Leadership Program, I met Courtney. Last year, when she invited me to share my presentation for an event she was organizing, I discovered she was the co-founder (with two other HOBY program grads) of a non-profit called “Project Play NH”.

From their website: http://projectplaynh.wix.com/projectplaynh

“In order to help ease the financial burden of playing sports, Project PLAY was created. Project PLAY is a non-profit organization that sponsors underprivileged children in southern NH to play organized sports. The organization does this by paying for children’s league registration fees and by providing them with equipment. The goal of Project PLAY is to promote a healthy and safe lifestyle to underprivileged youth while giving them an opportunity that would not have otherwise been available.”

Awesome.

Not only are they still young people themselves, they are reaching out to kids who may be struggling to enjoy their absolutely incredible athletic talent.

Do YOU know some absolutely incredible kids?

Could you let them know how much you think of them, or share their awesomeness with the world somehow?

Sometimes all it takes is a kind word or a high-five, for that absolutely incredible kid to try even harder, and do even better…and to want to reach out to give back, inspiring the next incarnation of absolutely incredible kids.

As adults, we’ve been there. We know how hard it can be to want to stand out and make a difference.

Do YOU know a young person who is absolutely incredible?

Are YOU still an absolutely incredible kid, at heart?

THIS JUST IN!

Within minutes of posting this blog, I received this message from a reader who said “YES, I know some absolutely incredible kids!”

Here is her message: 

I took my mom to the oncologist on Friday, which is always kind of grim, and at the nurses’ station they offered her a “gift bag” made by a local Daisy troop (pre-Girl Scouts). The actual items were pretty general (a toothbrush, bottle of water, etc.)—although there was one thin mint—but the best part was a photo of all the girls (kindergarten age or so) with get well wishes and their troop number on the back.

The gift bag was blue, so we didn’t see the writing in blue pen until we got back out into the sunlight. The little girl who had filled the bag had written “I love you!” 

The whole thing was so sweet, when I got home I decided to use the troop number to track down the girls if possible so I could send them a thank-you note and let them know that their act of kindness mattered. I used Google and found someone, and I sent her an email with a note for the girls and much praise for their work. I described the bag my mom had received and said how touched we were. Less than five minutes later, I received a reply. Not only had I found the leader, but it was her own daughter who had made my mom’s bag. She said the note moved her to tears, and they are all going to make some cards for my mom.  

So, yes, I “know” some incredible kids!

When Will Daryl Dixon Take a Bath?

I absolutely love the A&E show ‘The Walking Dead’.

For those who don’t watch, it chronicles the daily struggles of a ragtag group of people trying to survive the flesh-eating undead (and often the evil living) in a post-Zombie-Apocalyptic world.

Over and over, the group has encountered hope and promise of a safe haven, only to have it dashed on the rocks…most often by the living.

One of the first things to go for some people, in this world, is their humanity.

The latest oasis is a former ‘planned community’ of largely self-sustaining luxury homes.

When the crap hit the fan and the American populace being turning into zombies, a sturdy steel wall was built and a small group of survivors set up camp.

As they ventured outside their own fortress for supplies and reconnaissance, they became aware of our ragtag group making their way through the area.

What happened next was a mix of emotional reactions and trust issues.

Wanting to believe in salvation, several members of the group immediately trusted their new friends and set up shop in their new digs.

Some of them did so reluctantly, with their antennae still high in the air in case of trouble.

One member has remained fiercely vigilant and refuses to let his guard down.

He is Daryl Dixon, played with bad-ass brilliance by actor Norman Reedus.

Daryl’s been through it all.

He had a tough life prior to the apocalypse and it hasn’t gotten much easier.

He doesn’t let too many people in, and he walks his talk with little more than grunted whispers of caution.

Daryl’s got scars, and those scars make it tough for him to embrace new opportunities.

Heck, as the other characters are rejoicing in clean new clothes and a shave (one character even spent 20 minutes enjoying the brushing of her teeth), Daryl refuses to put down his guard (or his prized crossbow) long enough to pick up a bar of soap.

I get it.

He’s been burned so many times that his soul’s scar tissue reads like a manifesto of pain, telling him not to trust anyone whose promises sound much like the hollow ones they’ve heard too many times in the past…many of which have led to pain, loss and suffering.

We need to remember: trust has been good for Daryl as well.

This ragtag group of survivors has become his family.

They’ve been through the fire and have killed (the living and the dead) to protect each other.

Is there a little Daryl in you?

Are you remembering to surround yourself with those who’ve got your back, who can offer guidance, love and protection?

Or are you spending your life missing out on that, fearful that any moment could bring your downfall?

I hope you’ve been able to develop your own support network.

It’s not the blood that courses through your veins that makes a family, it is the blood you are willing to shed for each other.

While we always need to be careful, some days we do need to learn to trust the world a little more to make our existence a bit easier.

Sometimes you need to pick up that bar of soap and wash off the pain and misery, knowing that you’re good enough to have gotten this far…and you can survive another day.

Pick up the soap, Daryl.

If you watched last Sunday’s episode you know that if he doesn’t, the character of Carol (who adores him) has already threatened to hose him down in his sleep (one of the greatest lines of the night).

She’s got his back.

Who’s got yours?

Giving: Who? You. When? Now. How? Keep reading…

I’m not much of a ranter. It’s just not my thing (unless I get to add some really sarcastic humor).

In a world that seems to hand us a million reasons to complain every day (more than that if you watch the same negative blatherings of more than one news network), I am happier to focus on the positive, as tough as it can be to find some days.

This winter has been long. Heck, our first storm was the Blizzard of Thanksgiving and we’re almost to Saint Patrick’s Day!

It has also been setting records across the country for consistent freezing temperatures.

Roofs are collapsing. Ice dams are looming precariously over our heads and cars.

Despite all that, in an ever-widening circle around southern New Hampshire, hearts and minds and hands and feet are warming.

What began as a fun idea just over 2 years ago has blossomed into something I’ve grown very proud of…not for what’s been done, but for the number of people who’ve become part of the ‘family’.

I still remember one of the very first ‘giving missions’ of BeachBum Philanthropy (click the name to like us on Facebook). Through the Friends of Kevin Radio Show (hosted by one of my favorite ‘good guys’ Kevin Willett), I heard about a family whose teenage son wanted to be able to ride on a special tandem bike with his mom. I think we sent a few dollars, then wrote a blog about them.

I was overjoyed to hear that they raised enough to buy the bike a week later.

When you get enough people to care…things happen!

The biggest joy for me?

Being part of a group of people who each gave a little here and there, and then shared the message. It wasn’t one big check. It was a whole bunch of people and small businesses, coming together to make something pretty awesome happen.

That is what BeachBum Philanthropy is all about. We are not an official non-profit, and may never be. There is too much paperwork…and far too many rules for my liking.

We see, we feel, we give, and we share as many ideas as we can find so that others can be inspired and educated as to how easy giving really is.

That’s it.

Not sure what you can do?

Stores like The Dollar Tree and Big Lots are perfect places to start.

On Friday, I learned that a local homeless shelter needed hand-crank can openers. Got them for a dollar each.

I also found full-sized tubes of toothpaste at Big Lots for 90-cents each.

You can find a bag of disposable razors, 10 for a dollar.

It doesn’t cost much to give.

You just have to want to. It’s that easy.

Not everybody does, and I’m cool with that.

They have their reasons, and I respect them.

I simply choose to hang with the people who do like to give.

They’re fun. They tend to be happier. They have something special about them.

Why do I give?

Because I like the feeling, whether it’s done anonymously or not.

I don’t need awards. I don’t need a library named after me. I don’t need the press.

At the end of the day, if I know I did my best to make at least one life, beside my own, better than day…it was a win.

Please remember it is important to honor yourself as well.

You have to learn to let others help YOU sometimes.

It took me a while to learn that.

I used to think so little of myself that I denied others the opportunity to help me.

Big lesson learned.

Who can give?

You can.

If you’re not sure where to start, we’d compiled a great list of ‘little stuff’ needed by most shelters athttp://SteveGamlin.com/giving

Thank you for giving me the gift of staying with me through the first 648 words of this blog.

I gratefully accept your attention.

Thank you! 

Here We (Don’t ) Go Again!

My life is beginning to feel like a mash-up of “Groundhog Day” and “Planes, Trains and Automobiles”.

For the third time in two weeks (between me and Tina) a trip to the airport was canceled, or at least short-lived.

Yesterday I was all set to leave New Hampshire for San Diego, where double-digit temperatures are the norm and…hell that was enough for me!

It was supposed to be a couple of days spent with a good friend from halfway around the world. We’ve never actually met face-to-face. The plan was to brainstorm my marketing strategy as I continue to build the on-line education and customer engagement components of my speaking career.

Here was the reality.

After a sketchy night of sleep punctuated by the occasional panic of “Was that my alarm, am I late?”, I showered at 3am, dragged my suitcases down the snow-covered deck stairs and rumbled off through the slush to the airport.

After checking in and waiting for security to open, I got a text from the ever-vigilant Tina: “Your 5:05am take-off is already delayed a half-hour, you’re probably not going to make your connection in Philly, the next flight to San Diego is at 6:30pm…and it is already sold out.”

Ugh…decision time.

Do I try to patch together a series of flights, which could cause my trip to span more than a day, only to arrive and then have and equally tough time getting home with this weekend’s expected snowfall?

(By the way, I have a friend whose been trying for THREE days to get home from Florida).

How we act, react, overact…all comes down to our choice of attitude.

The woman at the US-Air counter did her best, she was most pleasant and helpful.

Several of us who were most affected by the initial delay were gathered around her, listening for alternatives.

Nothing was working.

I told her I was willing to cancel the trip, as my window of opportunity was already tiny.

The other passengers chose to roll the dice and ride out the delay.

As the woman handed me my paperwork, I exclaimed “Hey, at let my car is probably still warm!”

The man behind me commented on how I was able to keep a positive attitude.

It’s a choice.

And we all have it.

I’ve seen people handle similar stressful situations with class and patience…and I’ve seen people morph into Olympic-caliber a**holes over the tiniest inconvenience.

How are YOU handling the week, the weather, the winter?

Every day we make choices of how we react to things.

I was at peace with my decision.

It means I will miss the opportunity to spend time with a friend who graciously offered to spend time helping me and enjoy a planned ‘acts of kindness’ mission…but it also means I was here today to take care of snow removal for myself and my family.

It’s all in how we think, act and react.

For me, it even brought a laugh as I paid for the “Shortest-term long-term parking ticket” ever.

As a final note, I continually checked on my flight throughout the day: it didn’t leave Manchester until after 2pm…a nine+ hour delay.

Ladies and gentleman, welcome to real life…buckle up, it might get bumpy.

We hope you choose to enjoy your trip. 

Taking Your Shot Means So Much More Than the Score!

It’s one thing to have a dream.

It’s another thing to let others know what your dream is.

But the magic happens when those people line up the opportunity for you to take your shot…and rock the world!

A familiar fixture on the basketball sidelines, North Branch Michigan Broncos team manager Chris Hodges provides an endless fountain of encouraging words.

Most of all, despite his special needs challenges, he wanted to play.

During a recent game, his coach and his teammates set him up for success…and he scored, BIG TIME.

During the 4th quarter of a recent game, Coach Mark Stevens called Chris’ number.

Not only did he get to hit the hardwood…he hit TWO baskets!

Years from now, nobody will remember the score.

It won’t matter.

The victory is the moment that a challenge was overcome and a dream was realized.

What dreams do YOU have for 2015?

Are you practicing?

Have you let others know what your dream is, so that they can help set you up for success?

Do you have coaches and mentors who can help you hone your skills, so that you’ll be ready when the time comes to take your shot?

It’s more than a game…it’s life.

Don’t wish it away, sitting on the bench.

Take your shots. Hit them or miss them, it doesn’t always matter.

This is what I love most about the “Engaging Your WHY (Vision Board Success)” program I share with my clients.

I get to the be there, on life’s court, to hear their dreams and to see their teammates rally around them with encouragement.

Over time, I hear about the shots taken…and proudly cheer every attempt.

What shots do YOU need to take?

What game do YOU wish to play?

The clock is ticking…

Here’s the link to Chris’ story.

http://www.wnem.com/story/28066725/special-needs-student-gets-his-shot-of-a-lifetime#ixzz3RKxzO0Mu

Hey Baby…That Doesn’t Look Like Belize!

If only Mother Nature and Old Man Winter could stop ‘Stormicating’, we might catch a break.

During a 10-day stretch over the last couple weeks, at least 7 of them included shoveling, snowblowing, plowing…and getting sick. Between 3 yards and driveways, lack of sleep, and a charitable face-first run into an ice-cold ocean, my body finally gave out.

I’ve spent the past 5 days drowning in cold meds, trying to empty out my lungs and get myself back into shape to start all over again.

I don’t like being sick. I’m not good at it.

What sucked the most for me, although it was the right decision to make, was the last-minute postponing of our vacation.

It was Tina’s idea to get away, mid-winter, for a soul-recharging cruise through the Caribbean.

It was also her idea to reschedule it because she didn’t want me to suffer through flights feeling as bad as I did.

She is awesome.

So instead of the warm Caribbean with our balcony views of Mexico and Belize, we get the all-too-familiar views of the snowbanks which seem to grow taller daily here in Goffstown NH.

I felt bad, but it was yet another lesson to be learned.

Life happens.

It could be much worse.

Even as I ran the snowblower around the yard on rubbery legs over the weekend, I realized I am luckier than most.

I have a snowblower…and I have two good legs which, when not compromised by mixing to many cold meds, work just fine.

I also have the woman of my dreams who kept track of all the times to ingest what seemed like an endless array of meds.

My usual routine is ‘throw a bunch of them in at random and see what happens’.

It’s not always effective for cold relief, but has definitely enhanced my listening of Pink Floyd and Jimi Hendrix.

So here I sit, on a snowy Monday morning in Goffstown NH, thousands of miles from the cruise ship that was supposed to hauling my wheezing carcass around the Caribbean.

How do I feel?

Grateful.

Colds pass, cruises get re-booked, snow melts…and I am filled with gratitude for all the blessings I have in this life.

Does that mean we never feel disappointed?

Not at all.

It all comes down to where we focus.

Right now, mine is not directed thousands of miles away in paradise…it is looking into the living room to the beautiful woman sitting on the couch working on her laptop.

She’ll roll her eyes when she realized I am looking at her and smiling.

Paradise is where you find it, and mine is right here at home.

You have something to be grateful for…probably a number of things.

Please remind yourself of them daily, so you don’t miss them.

Keep Your Head in the Game, Don’t Miss Your SUPERtunity!

On a recent Sunday night I got to watch something pretty amazing.

Yes, my beloved Patriots won.

Yes, Tom Brady has reached the upper echelon of premier quarterbacks in NFL history.

The person I want to mention is Malcolm Butler.

Until yesterday, I hadn’t heard of him. An undrafted rookie? Good luck, kid.

He didn’t even start yesterday’s game, but he was ready if the coaches needed him.

They’d pushed him hard all season, and had earned their confidence.

When Patriots veteran Kyle Arrington showed signs of having trouble covering his man, Butler got the call.

It didn’t take long for near-disaster to happen.

When Seattle’s quarterback bombed one downfield near the end of the game, Butler tipped the ball…and a tumbling Jermaine Kearse juggled and ultimately caught a miracle.

Even as he quickly tagged Kearse down (he could have otherwise gotten up and scampered in for a score), Butler says he went back to the sideline feeling he had just failed his team and cost them the Big Game.

With his pride deflated, his teammates rallied around him, telling him to keep his head up.

Just two plays later, as it looked like the final nail was about to be hammered into the Patriots’ coffin, Butler stepped up…BIG TIME.

He saw an opportunity and took it, timing it perfectly to break up a surefire touchdown with an explosive interception…preserving a Patriots win.

This kid…an undrafted and unheralded rookie with a past that would raise eyebrows from many organizations…made something pretty incredible happen.

When you keep your head down, you miss opportunities.

Thank you, Malcolm Butler, for keeping your head in the game.

Thank you, Butler’s teammates, for propping up your brother when he was down.

Wherever YOU are in YOUR game today, please embrace the lesson.

Whatever the scoreboard says, keep your head and your heart in the game.

You never know what Super-tunity might be waiting for you.

Make the play.

Celebrate as a team.

Come back tomorrow and play again.

Two’s Company…Two Dozen is a Mission!

I was once asked what my life’s aspirations are.

“That’s easy” I replied, “I want to hang out committing acts of kindness, speaking, writing and learning to surf.”

“So, you want to be a beach bum?” the person asked.

Yup.

Several years later, here I am: speaking, writing and I learned how to surf.

I have also fallen head over heels in love with committing acts of kindness.

What began as holding doors open and buying coffee for someone on a cold day has exploded into a full-on daily giving mission.

A couple years ago, my good friend Dave Waldman (of B2B Video Solutions) asked how many acts of kindness I thought we could commit in an hour.

“I don’t know…let’s find out.”

With Dave in tow, camera rolling, we hit the streets and had a blast!

Here is the video he created: BeachBum Philanthropy on the Road

The purpose was two-fold: show people how easy it can be to commit acts of kindness, and to give ideas of what they can do.

What happened after that?

My phone was ringing, and the e-mails were dinging my inbox.

“How can we do that?”

“What do you need?”

“Can I come out with you next time?”

One of those people was my friend Ruth. One of her many cool talents is writing. She is a reporter.

She asked: “How many acts of kindness do you think we could commit in a day?”

Several weeks later, we decided to find out.

According to her article, the total was fifty.

I was exhausted…and smiling.

The best part?

We met the coolest people during our day-long journey, who taught US some really cool ways to help others!

As the BeachBum Philanthropy mission has grown, more and more people have come on board to be part of the giving.

The more the merrier!

Some people have been critical that we give so much attention to promoting acts of kindness. One very religious person commented (on a Facebook page dedicated to a day of goodness) that people who commit kind acts and post them are bragging, and that most of us are a**holes the other 364 days of the year. He even said he ‘hated’ the whole idea of us posting them.

Yes, he actually used those words.

My reply?

The mission was to share ideas which could inspire others to commit acts of their own, not to promote ourselves as ‘better than anyone else’. I also added that Jesus was a wonderful giver who probably didn’t call people a**holes when they did good things to help his people. 

That was the end of that.  J

Since then, more than two dozen ‘Honorary BeachBums’ have become part of our team. They are reaching out to family and friends, and friends of friends, and meeting me in parking lots with bags of clothing, food, personal care supplies, outdoor gear for the homeless and more!

Every day, I am pleasantly surprised and encouraged by every gesture.

One person recently said “I wish I could be more.”

After posting what she’d given, others stepped up with the same items, saying “We didn’t know you needed these, we have a bunch of them!”

Well, my dear BeachBum friend, you DID give more….you inspired others to give.

And that is awesome.

How can YOU be a BeachBum today?

We’ve compiled a whole big list of ways, right here:http://SteveGamlin.com/giving

The Quote That ROCKED My Breakfast!

“If you don’t contribute, don’t complain” (Frank Sonnenberg)

Saw this quote earlier today on Facebook.

It screamed at me.

My first thoughts were about elections, when so many people say “You don’t have a right to complain if you don’t vote”.

I believe there is truth in that.

But it goes so much deeper.

Every single day, there are people complaining about things over which they, as individuals, have no control. What they fail to realize, though, is that while they may not be able to have an effect on the issue globally, they can affect it locally.

After all, if enough people care enough to take small actions, global shifts can happen.

Take homelessness. It’s a huge problem in this country.

Overcrowded shelters can’t take care of them all.

In some communities, the housing crisis of 2008-2009 left a glut of empty homes gathering dust on the market.

Several years ago, a program in Utah began giving homes to the homeless. Is it a perfect answer to the problem? Maybe, maybe not. Results have shown that is has helped reduce the levels of chronic homelessness and, for those who just needed a break to get back on their feet, helped instill a sense of pride and purpose.

Far too many Americans are going hungry each day.

Can one person feed them all?

No, but can we each help make a difference?

Yes.

For the past several Summers, my step-mom has invested in an extra tomato plant for her deck.

Every tomato from that plant is donated to a local shelter for women and their kids.

My mom and her husband have been sharing the bounty of their garden as well, providing a plethora of fresh vegetables to various shelters, and also giving them starter plants so that they can grow their own. 

By taking pride and sharing responsibility in the care of the plants, those in need have become active participants in their own recovery.

The homeless person wearing raggedy clothing barely stands a chance to get a job based on appearance, despite any skills he or she may possess.

There are programs out there (this I know because my family and friends have made donations) which work with shelters and unemployment programs to provide gently-used professional clothing to help these people stand a chance in the court of public opinion and perception.

So…how can YOU change the world today?

If you say that you can’t, you’re wrong.

You probably have, somewhere in your closet, an article of clothing you haven’t worn in years which is ten times better than what someone in need is wearing right now.

If you say you don’t have time, you’re lying.

Holding a door for someone and smiling costs you nothing (you had to open that door for yourself anyway, unless you’re a ghost) and you might be the only person who even acknowledges that person today.

If you say you will, but you don’t…you’re a hypocrite.

So many people say they want to help but let themselves off the hook by saying “I just didn’t know what to do”.

I’ve got a whole page dedicated to ideas. Some of them are so easy that your wallet won’t even know you’re sneaking up on it for a buck or two.  http://SteveGamlin.com/giving

Who can change the world?

You can.

Based on my personal experience, I bet that if you do start helping, you might even complain less and encourage more.

Instead of finger-pointing and exclaiming that ‘someone’ should be helping, you can be the living breathing example of someone who actually gives a crap about the world…and is doing something about it.

You rock.

I am pointing my finger at you right now, and I am smiling.

Make a difference.

You know you can.